The Good, the silent and the lonely
by 4evergaara
Summary: Years of silence hindered Des'Terrae from reaching her potential, but after the help from The Companions she will not only find friends, but harships, love and even a voice she had always wanted. First Skyrim story and first one I've written about a mute character. It won't be the greatest, I know. Eventually Vilkas/Dragonborn, but nothing too sexual.
1. Chapter 1

The good, the silent and the lonely

A Skyrim story.

***Check Author's notes at the end!***

No words, no speeches, not even a single peep. That's how it's been for all of Des'Terrae's life, just silence. It felt so foreign to her. She tried so hard to say the smallest of sentences, but nothing. Everyone around Des took notice to this within a short amount of time. She always had a large book and a piece of charcoal at the ready. It was no different from when she met her soon-to-be shield-brothers and shield-sisters. She had been through the same regiment too many times to count. Arriving at the doors of Jorrvaskr, she was enamored by the beauty of the building. It was something like she had never seen. Her legs felt weak, Des had wanted to join The Companions for years. She wanted to be around people who would take her in, even if she didn't have the voice to thank them.

_ This is what it's like? It's more beautiful than I imagined. _She thought. Her heart leapt into her throat as she pulled on the door handle. Des was greeted by a warm fire pit in the center of the room and a few sets of eyes wander over to her. She removed her ragged hood, folding it as best she could to put in her satchel. She swapped it out for her book and charcoal. Des glanced over the room and saw a woman sitting by herself at a table. She was hesitant at first, but continued to walk to her. She tapped the woman on the shoulder, causing her to jump.

"What do you want?" She snapped. Des quickly scrawled onto a page in her book. She held the book in front of herself for the woman to see. _"Is this where I can join the Companions?"_ She wrote. The woman looked at her in a puzzled manner.

"Why do you write this in your book? Can't you speak what you want?" She asked. Des shook her head.

"Why not?" She asked. Des paused and wrote once more. _"I am not exactly sure. I've been like this since I can remember." _She wrote. The woman figured it was best not to pry any further.

"To answer your first question, yes. You would have to talk to Kodlak, though. Are you sure you want to join The Companions...?" She motioned for Des to give her name and an answer. _"I've wanted to join The Companions since I started my training. My name is Des'Terrae." _

"Des'Terrae, I'm not sure it would be safe for you to join." She said. _"I want to join because everyone else turned me away. Please, I want to join. It would mean so much to me." _ Des tensed up as she let the woman read.

"Alright, but you need to see Kodlak. He has more authority than I do." She said. Des grinned. _"Thank you! May I ask for your name?" _

"Aela. You better know what you are getting yourself into, Des'Terrae." She warned.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Author's notes: Whew! This is the first time I have written about a mute character, and the first time I've written about Skyrim! This is mostly meant to cover how Des joined The Companions, how she fell in love with Vilkas, and how she is able to start speaking. Hang in there, because we have a lot more to cover in the next part.


	2. Chapter 2

Part 2.

Des wandered down to the living quarters, not exactly sure on where to find this Kodlak fellow. She seemed puzzled, the rooms weren't marked as to whom they belonged to but she managed to figure it out with a bit of trial and error. She walked into a taller and seemingly fiercer fighter than she normally came across. She worried for a second that she might have made him mad for not paying much attention. She looked down at her book and jumped at the sound of his voice.

"You should try to watch where you are walking, miss." He glanced over his shoulder. Des turned around to look at him, but he started to walk off. _Should I go apologize? It's probably nothing, and I think he'll forgive me._ She dismissed. Out of her peripheral vision, she saw an elderly man having a conversation with a younger, intelligent man. I wonder if those two could help me. They seem like they know who's-who around here. She approached the two of them and tapped the shoulder of the older man.

"Yes?" He asked. Des'Terrae wrote in her book as neatly as she could. The younger man seemed slightly intrigued. _"Are you the man they call Kodlak?"_ She inquired.

"I am. Why do you ask, stranger?" Kodlak answered. Her face seemed to light up at his answer. She grinned as she wrote. _"I wish to join the companions, if there is room for more members." _

"Might I ask why you aren't speaking to Kodlak?" The intelligent man asked. Des turned to him. _"I would love to, but my body won't allow me to."_ She stated. They both looked at her with questions.

"When you say 'your body won't allow you', do you mean you've been afflicted by an illness or an injury?" He asked. _"I've had these problems since I was a child. It was the reason why I was turned down from every guild I've tried to join."_

"Why do you want to join the companions? Do you know what danger you face?" Kodlak asked. _"I want to join in hopes of not being rejected for being mute. I know I would face many dangers, but we face danger in our everyday lives. What difference would it make if I wanted to go head-first into a fight rather than being forced to protect myself?"_ Kodlak thought about her request. He sighed and told her.

"If you wish to join, then who am I to stop you? You at least acknowledge that you will be facing serious risks, and that is a commendable trait."

"Kodlak, she needs to be able to defend herself in battle." The intelligent man stated.

"You are right about that, Vilkas. Tell me, how well do you fight?" Kodlak asked_. "I'm not exactly the best at handling a weapon, but I can fight." _ Des wrote.

"I see. Vilkas, why don't you take her to the yard and test the whelp." Kodlak said.

"Aye." Vilkas replied. He stood up, while Des tailed behind him.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

"I never did ask for your name. If you haven't picked up on it, my name is Vilkas. What is yours?" _"Des'Terrae. It's nice to meet you, Vilkas."_

"Des'Terrae, huh? Well, since Kodlak insisted that I tested your skill, let's start. Don't worry about hurting me. I'll be fine." They both drew their swords. Vilkas got into a more defensive stance, while her expression changed slightly. She swung at him with a good amount of force, but not enough to push him back. She turned immediately and struck his shield again from the side. Vilkas saw that there was a bit more that she could learn, but was at an alright start. She put all of her force into her final strike. Vilkas was impressed by it, and sheathed his sword and shield.

"Not bad, Des'Terrae. You have a bit more to learn, but that shouldn't really be a problem. Here, take my sword. Take it to Eorlund, but be careful." Vilkas warned. Des nodded and dashed off to the Skyforge.

Eolund was working at the moment, when he felt a woman's hand on his shoulder. He turned to see who was disturbing his work.

"You must be the new whelp." Eolund said. Des sat Vilkas' sword on the stone next to her, and wrote. _"Vilkas asked me to give this to you so you could sharpen it."_ He looked at it, and nodded.

"I see. Do you mind doing something for me?" _"Sure! I would be happy to help."_

"I have a shield that needs to be taken to Aela, but since I have to leave for family purposes I can't take it to her." _"I see. I will go do that now, Eolund."_

"Thank you. Now, if you'll excuse me." Eolund said. Des walked back to Jorrvaskr with Aela's shield in her hands. She headed for Aela's living quarters, but noticed that she was speaking to someone.

"Ah, Des'Terrae, come in. We were just talking about you." Aela said confidently. Aela looked at her and noticed that Des had her shield. "And you brought my shield, thanks." Des handed her the shield, which she put on the wall behind the man.

"This is the whelp? I heard she gave Vilkas a run for his gold." He said. Des rubbed the back of her head and blushed a bit.

"You do underestimate yourself, but I like your honesty and your perseverance. Why don't you let Farkas show you where you'll be resting."

"Farkas!" The other man shouted. Farkas dashed into the doorway behind the three of them within a few minutes.

"You called?" He asked.

"Yes, Icebrain. Why don't you show the whelp where she'll be sleeping for the night?" Aela asked.

"Alright." Farkas replied. Des followed him as they walked down the hall from where Aela was. "Even if Aela and Skjor like to tease me, they're good people. They challenge us to do our best." Des nodded and continued to follow him. They stopped at the end of the hall on the other side of the stairs.

"It doesn't really matter which bed you pick, just fall in one and sleep. It looks like the others are happy to see you," He paused for a second, "If you're looking for work, just talk to Aela or me. If you make a name for yourself, Skjor and Vilkas will have work for you. However, I do have a job already set for you, if you don't mind already starting. It's just that we're having problems at Whiterun Hold." _"Alright. I'll try to do what I can."_ Des wrote.

"I knew you could be counted on. Do whatever is necessary." Farkas said.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Author's Notes: Yes! I made it through another chapter! Now you could see why I said there is a lot in this part to cover. Next time, we'll be going through Des'Terrae's first tasks.


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3.

At least this beats sleeping on the ground or on splintery wood, and waking up frequently in the middle of the night. She thought. Des missed sleeping in a bed. Albeit the bed wasn't as large as the one in Lillandril, but it was warm and quite inviting. She decided that she should eat something since she hadn't eaten much today. She moseyed up the stairs from the living quarters and found herself a spot to sit next to Athis. He glanced over his shoulder to see who it was. He acknowledged her, and then went back to his own business before being called away. She gathered a small plate for herself and began to eat. She also started to write in a smaller, hide-bound journal with a quill.

"Arry'nne, my stay in Skyrim will have to be prolonged for a few more months. I truly am sorry, but if I want to be in the Companions, I have to work hard at it. The Comapnions are an… interesting bunch. There is Aela the Huntress, Vilkas and his brother Farkas, Skjor, Kodlak and several more who I haven't gotten the chance to talk to, yet. I hope you and Jaralin have found a nice home in Cheydinhal. The last time I heard from you was when you were thinking of getting married. Hopefully, when I do return I can bring you some of the things I found here. The clothes are beautiful, and the fruit is both ripe and sweet. There are so many things I wish you could see for yourself…" She continued to write, not noticing that Vilkas had sat down beside her.

"Des'Terrae, are you enjoying yourself here?" He asked. She almost leapt out of her seat. Her cheeks turned pink, and her heart was racing. Des scrambled to shut the hide-bound journal and grab her other book. "Vilkas, you scared me half to death!" She wrote.

"I didn't mean to startle you, I was just curious." Vilkas said. "To answer your question, I am enjoying it. The carvings in the wood are gorgeous, the atmosphere is lively and welcoming, and the food is delicious." Vilkas chuckled. The two of them conversed about little things for a while, while Farkas had jumped into the conversation. They reveled in past memories of their own, while telling each other about their own journeys. Farkas was enveloped in Des' story of her home in Lillandril, imagining all the vivid colors along with old, crumbling buildings. Eventually, they decided to turn in for the eve. Des knew she had important business in the morning.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Des set out for Whiterun hold once the sun was at its peak. It was the perfect time to run errands. There were very few travelers out on the beaten path, but Des didn't mind it. She rather enjoyed it because it was one less thing she had to worry about. The tapping of her soles were sounds she grew accustomed to as her walk continued. I hope I'm close to Whiterun hold. She thought. Upon arriving, she came across two bandits who wanted money.

"You should have stayed in your precious forests, elf!" One of the bandits yelled. I'm no Wood Elf, fool! She thought. Des readied her sword, and prepared herself for the first swing. She turned to see them, and parried her attacker's strike. The Second bandit swiped her satchel and tried to tear it from her side. She screamed out of pain and started to swing her sword recklessly. They backed off for a second, and then lunged in for another attack. The taller one of the two struck her side causing her to wince. She continued to fight, only to get hit three more times. Des was tempted to surrender, but she snapped out of her current state of mind and regained her courage. She managed to hit the taller bandit's leg, leaving a large gash on the side of his knee. He fell to the ground, hovering over his leg.

"My leg! The Wench got my leg!" He screamed as he tried to cover the wound. She not only cut him, but scraped her sword along his Femur. The two of them fled as fast as they could. Des sheathed her sword and grabbed her torch.

As Des cleared out the last of the rats that infested the hold, the stench of decaying flesh started to bite at her senses. She tore a piece of her satchel off and drenched it in Nordic Mead. It may have smelled like disgusting swill, but it was better than the smell of death.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Des returned to Jorrvaskr, limping once she opened the door. Her wounds needed to be tended to, but decided to wait until she was about to go to bed. She stumbled down to the Living quarters and picked the bed furthest from the door. She removed her breastplate and tried to reach for the bandages on the shelf. Her side stung, bleeding profusely again before she recoiled and grabbed at her wound. Vilkas peered into the room and saw Des cringing in the corner.

"Des'Terrae! Do you need help? Are you hurt?" Vilkas ran to her side. She nodded, wincing and starting to tear up. Vilkas folded a rag and started to apply the bandages. The rag stained immediately. Des' pain slowly stopped she laid down.

"Are you alright?" Vilkas asked. Des nodded, and shifted in her bed.

"You should probably lie down for a while before you join us in the Underforge." She shook her head no and sat up in her bed. Des put on her dirtied armor and limped behind Vilkas.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

"Are you ready?" Skjor asked. Vilkas walked past the two of them and returned to Jorrvaskr. Des nodded and followed Skjor. She tried to keep up before he noticed that she was trailing behind.

"Aela has agreed to be your forebearer." Skjor stated. He proceeded to speak about the Companions' "gift" and Des tried to follow along as best she could. Skjor trotted over to Aela and sliced at her palm, filing up the basin with her blood. Des cupped a small amount of it into her hands and drank. Her head throbbed, and she felt a shortness of breath. What in Talos…?! She thought. Her skin started to darken and fur sprouted all over her arms, legs and back. The sound of skin stretching and tearing echoed throughout the Underforge. Des' body realigned itself to her new form.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

After a few weeks of writer's hell, Chapter 3 has made it out of the think tank and onto your computer screens. I know I said I would try to get this out before the 1st of August, but I just couldn't think of anything. I hope you all enjoy it, and give me feedback. I really do appreciate feedback, so that I know where to go with the story.


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4.**

The smell of corpses filled the air again. Des'Terrae was shaking profusely from the cold winter winds and from being tossed into the side of a boulder. Her heart pounded against her rib cage. Aela put her ear to Des' body and listened for a few seconds.

"She's still breathing, but barely. I don't think she has the energy to move."

"Take her back to Jorrvaskr and let her rest. She would be of no use in this state." Aela grabbed her arm and roped it around her shoulder. She gripped her hip and started to return to Jorrvaskr.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

_"Arry'nne! Arry'nne!" Des'Terrae called out. She returned to Cheydinhal after several years of living in Skyrim. Arry'nne set her baskets down and gave Des a hug. _

_ "By the Nines, it's been so long! Des'Terrae, how are you?" She asked. _

_ "Excellent! Whilst I was away, I met someone. He is as sweet as Jazbay Crostata and extremely smart. We were to be visiting a Temple of Mara, but I insisted that we waited until we returned home." Des said._

_ "Is he the muscular fellow over there?"Arry'nne notioned over to the young man._

_ "Yes. His name is… V-? Vil… Ven... Vilk…?" His name was just out of reach. She knows that she has seen him before, but she just can't remember his name..._

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Des'Terrae bolted out of her bed and panted heavily. Her body ached, crying out in pain. _Was it just a dream?_ She thought to herself. She ran her fingers along her throat and felt the jagged bite marks that riddled her neck and shoulders. She ran her hand under the robes that covered her and pushed them off. Bloody bandages covered her breasts, midsection, hips and legs. Des lied back down and groaned.

"You are one of the most stubborn elves I've met, whelp." Farkas said from the other side of the room. Des propped herself up as best as she could to hear him.

"You really did give us a scare, whelp. We thought you were gonna pass on since you were losing so much blood." Farkas added, "It's best that you stay in bed until you're well enough to walk." Des nodded and grabbed a fruit off of the plate on the end table. Farkas left the room and went upstairs. Des rolled onto her side again and continued to eat as much as she could stomach.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

"How is she, Farkas?" Vilkas asked.

"She's awake, but she has to stay in bed. Why do you ask?"

"I'm just curious." He stated.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Des sat up again, and tried to stand up. Her legs wobbled, but she regained her balance within no time. She discarded her ragged robes for a freshly cleaned dress. After changing, she mustered up her energy and tried to join the others upstairs. _Easy now… Tease it, tease it… there we go. _She thought as she slowly ascended the stairs. She was quite impressed with herself, and how much better she felt now that most of her wounds were healed. Jorrvaskr was bustling with energy and joy. Everyone was laughing, singing, dancing or eating. It was an energy that made her feel lively and rejuvenated. She felt as if she was home in Lillandril.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Whew! Sorry it's so short, but I've been pretty busy. I dropped some foreshadowing on you guys, so you might want to try to figure that out. It's vital to the story later on.

Plus, I also made a reference to Achievement Hunter. Guess what that reference is.


	5. Chapter 5

Part 5.

Des sauntered over to the table so she could sit down. Her muscles were already sore again. Skjor had noticed that she was awake and moving about from the other side of the room. He turned back to Aela after a few minutes, and continued their conversation. Ria plopped in the seat next to her and slunk her arm around Des' shoulder.

"It's the first time I've seen you sulking around and the first time I get to have a conversation with you. More like half of a conversation." Ria taunted. Des'Terrae gave her a concerned look.

"Ahh, I'm just messing with you. So, how've you been holding up Des? I heard you got hurt pretty badly a while ago." Des shrugged and started to write.

_"I've been okay.I mean, I've been sore and I haven't had the energy to do much. I don't remember much as of lately, I just remember going to the underforge."_

"Do you remember anything else?"

_"No."_

"Well, the twins have been doting over you. From what I saw, Vilkas would hold your hand. It looks like he's taken a bit of interest in you, Des."

_"Don't you think you're jumping to conclusions already?"_

"Maybe, Maybe not. Either way, he was quite concerned. It was… a bit adorable." Ria stated. Des shook her head in doubt and sipped from the glass of Surilie Brothers Wine.

"You drink as though it was your last glass for the rest of your life. Come on, Des. Drink up! If you don't it will probably be gone by the time you finish your bottle." She said. Des nodded and sat her glass back on the table.

"Ria, are you giving Des a hard time?" Farkas said cheerfully.

"Of Course not, Farkas." She said.

"Good!" Farkas joined into their conversation and drank to his heart's content.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Des' body felt lighter than it normally did, but then again she had been drinking all night. She had been leaning against Vilkas who had been conversing with his brother and Kodlak about a Silver Hand Camp that had become more active within the last few days. Vilkas had agreed to carry her downstairs if she had fallen asleep. The conversation had taken a more serious tone within minutes.

"Kodlak, if we do not act now, we run the risk of having a surprise attack that will cost us." Aela stated.

"No. Since you were the one who had told Des'Terrae to wipe out that entire camp without any word from me, we are going to be waiting here since they have not provoked us directly."

"That is absurd!" Aela screamed as she threw her fists onto the table.

"Aela, Kodlak has a point." Vilkas mentioned. Their argument had continued for several minutes, before Des had noticed something peculiar. She had noticed a man who slid in through the doors and kept to the shadows. She watched him for a second, and then turned to Vilkas. She grabbed his arm and shook him until she got his attention.

"What is it, Des'Terrae? Need to be taken downstairs?" He asked. Her countenance practically said everything he needed to know. Vilkas had turned to the direction she pointed at and saw the man, too.

"Silver Hand!" He shouted. The others turned and readied their blades as fast as they could. Des'Terrae fled out of fear. The Silver Hand agent had already began swinging his daggers before they could even lay a single hit. He lunged for Kodlak, blades facing downward and the intent to kill. Skjor pushed Kodlak out of the Agent's path, and swung his sword at the Agent's side. His blade made a superficial wound, causing the Agent to stagger backwards. Within seconds, the Agent sprung back into action. He dived for Kodlak once again, and hit his target. The Agent pierced Kodlak's heart. The twins struck the Silver Hand Agent at once out of complete anger. Des'Terrae sprinted over to Kodlak and Skjor. She tried to assess the injuries as fast as she could. Des focused most of her energy on Kodlak, but she placed her palms onto their injuries. A gentle blue Aura emanated from her palms, causing a spectacle of blue lights to clash against the orange hue of the fire. Skjor pushed her hand away once his wound was healed. She tried to concentrate harder on Kodlak, but she was drained by the time Skjor was done. Kodlak choked and wheezed on his last words before he finally gave up. Des balled up her fists and bowed her head. Tears poured down her cheeks. She felt that she was the one to blame for not being able to save him.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

"We need to tell the others what happened." Vilkas said. Farkas was hunched over Des in an attempt to console her.

"Yeah." Aela Choked out. She and Skjor walked downstairs with their heads hung low. Vilkas lifted her off the ground and sat her on a bench. She wiped away the tears with her sleeve and tried to calm down. She grabbed her journal and wrote with a shaky hand.

_"This is my fault." She started. She tried to carry on her statement, but couldn't find the words. Des had started to write something else._

_ "When I was little, my mother and father knew I was different. They tried to find ways to help me speak. They went to many alchemists and magi with the hopes that they can find something to help me. When I was able to read spell books, I tried to find many restoration spells so that I could find my voice. I spent weeks trying to build up my energy, but no matter what spell I tried they never worked the way I wanted them to. I eventually gave up and looked into alternative methods of communication. Years passed. On that very same week I started to preform my spells, I started a trend. Every year, I would try every spell I knew and tried to use them to find my voice. They always ended with disappointment." _She finished writing her thought and let the others read it.

"So that's why you were able to help Skjor…" Farkas said. She nodded her head. Once Des'Terrae was done answering any questions they had, Vilkas carried her downstairs and laid her down in her bed.

She curled up, and cried once more.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

Once again, I do apologize for not being able to get this out to you guys sooner. I have been busy, I've had emotional problems of my own, and I haven't been feeling too well this week. Anywho, I hope you do enjoy this one. I put a lot of thought into it, and I have a feeling that it paid off.


	6. Chapter 6

Part 6.

* * *

It rained, and rained.

The funeral processions were held the following day. All of the companions had attended out of respect. Skjor and Aela went before their Shield Brothers and Sisters and started saying their praises and wishes of easy passage for Kodlak. They tried to keep themselves from cursing the Silver Hands, since this was a time for grieving. Des had clung to Vilkas' arm and sobbed through most of the speech. Others cried as well.

The procession didn't last long, due to the weather getting far worse. Most of them had went back inside to get dried off and warm up. Vilkas, Farkas , Aela, Skjor, and Des had went to the underforge. Des clung to Vilkas as much as she could. She felt a slight sense of comfort around him, one that she hasn't felt before.

~~~…~~~…~~~…~~~

"Des'Terrae, you should go change." Skjor said. She nodded and grabbed the dress that was handed to her. She walked away from the group, checking behind her to see if anyone followed her. She stripped down to her skivvies since they remained relatively dry. The soaked clothes were scattered all over the ground, making large 'thuds' as she dropped them. Des'Terrae stretched her arms and legs quickly before she wrung out her clothes. She heard light footsteps coming closer to her. Vilkas came out of the shadows to check if she was okay.

"Are you feeling better?" He aksed. She nodded to him slightly before going back to her clothes. She felt heat start to rise in her cheeks. She didn't mind having him around, she just hoped that he wasn't staring at her. Once she had wrung out all of her clothes, she stood up and tried to fold them. She caught a glimpse of him from the corner of her eye, and she saw his figure. He was a bit smaller in stature compared to his brother, but his figure was still well toned. She turned to him, and looked him over. Her heart beat got faster, and she felt like she had butterflies in her stomach. Vilkas looked at her, and got closer. She panicked, and turned away from him. Her cheeks turned a bright, rosy red. He came closer to her and tried to look at her more closely. She covered her face, to hide it from him as best she could.

"Des? It's okay to look. You need not be embarrassed." He whispered. She tried to get closer to him, but her knees started to feel weak.

"Des'Terrae, be honest with me. Do you like me?" He asked. She nodded and placed her hands on his chest.

"That does explain a lot." He said, "Since the first day I saw you, I've been interested in you." He put his hands on her sides and brought her closer to him. Des wrapped her arms around him, keeping her head nestled against him. She could hear his heart beat as though it was about to leap from his chest.

She wanted this moment to last.

* * *

Sorry for another short one, but I needed to write another chapter and I wanted to get this out to you guys soon. Sorry for the extremely long Hiatus, I've been busy trying to get my classes set up and whatnot.


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